Am I bothered?


‘Am I bothered?’ asked another, much more famous, redhead.  The implication being that she’s not and it’s a good thing.  Being bothered is uncool. 

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[Video] Making an apology


Some people never apologise, others are keen to restore harmony in their relationships when something goes wrong.  In this video I explore the types of situations in which it might be appropriate to make an apology and how to go about it.

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[Video] The 5-Minute NLP Seminar


People often ask me "What is NLP?" and there are lots of definitions, but when it comes to what you actually do in the practice of NLP, there is a very quick version of it.

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[Video] Dealing with Disagreement



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[Video] Introversion and Extraversion


I've always been interested in personality types, in fact I did part of my degree in Personality Psychology. So to start to explain what personality is all about is quite a big task. But there are some aspects of personality that are quite easy to spot, and if you can spot them they can be helpful in explaining some of the reasons why people behave and react differently from you in given circumstances.

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Learning for adults


Very few of us are taught how to learn. As a small child learning is as natural as breathing. The world is full of new experiences and objects to discover and we are constantly adding to our store of knowledge, skills and memories.

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[Video] Available Resources


One of my favourite presuppositions of NLP says that people are doing the best they can with the resources they have available, and the reason I like that is because I find it useful in lots of different circumstances. The NLP sense of the word resources includes not just the tangible resources that you might have; like time and budget and so on.

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7 keys to successful planning and goal-setting


1. Think BIG!

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[Video] Mind and Body


Today I'm going to have another look at one of the presuppositions of NLP, the one that says the mind and the body affect each other. This is one of the reasons why I got interested in NLP in the first place. I've always been interested in how the body works as well as how the mind works, and was always curious as a youngster about the power of the mind over the body, and whether it was possible to think yourself well.

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Why am I doing this?


If I’m really honest, I don’t like children very much. Shocking, I know. Not having any children of my own, I’m often irritated by the antics of small children in supermarkets and disapproving of their very presence in pubs and restaurants.

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[Video] Perceptual Positions


Perceptual Positions is the idea of being able to see something from somebody else's point of view or, indeed, from a completely different point of view. If you work in a service industry, you probably will have had it drummed into you that it's important to be able to see things from your customer's point of view.

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Perception is Projection


“Projections change the world into the replica of one’s own unknown face.” – C.G. Jung

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[Video] Positive Intentions


There's a presupposition of NLP which says that every behaviour has a positive intention. Now on first hearing that, lots of people have said to me over the years "I don't believe that's true." I'm not saying it's absolutely true.

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Being a Brilliant Coach


Have you noticed that there are moments in life when something becomes absolutely clear? It might be something you had never thought about before, or something you thought you knew, but suddenly there it is! 

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[Video] In Praise of Routine


When you hear the word routine do you feel your heart sink a bit? Lots of people hate routine. They think it's boring, dull and do whatever they can to escape it.

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What is a Phobia and how can you deal with it?


When a person reacts with extreme and debilitating fear to a harmless experience or entity, we say they have a phobia. Common phobias include fear of spiders, heights, lifts, snakes, flying and enclosed spaces.  Less common – but no less real for the sufferers - are the phobias about clowns, buttons, flowers or food.

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[Video] Influencing Upwards


When we did a survey of subscribers to our mailng list and asked people about some of the challenges they face at work, one of the things that lots of people identified as being a challenge for them was the business of 'influencing upwards'.

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Should you coach your own team?


Coaching works. No doubt about it. The quality conversations between a person and their coach can lead to massive increases in performance, to hugely enhanced confidence and skills or to the resolution of long-standing problems. It’s worth the time and money to get these types of results.

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[Video] What do we mean by Linguistic Skills?


When we talk about NLP - Neuro Linguistic Programming - most people are quite happy that they understand that the "Neuro" bit means it's to do with the brain and the nervous system. "Linguistic" obviously means it's to do with language; and the 'Programming" is about habits and changing habits.

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[Video] The Map Is Not The Territory


What does it look like when someone really takes on the NLP Presupposition of 'The Map is not the Territory'? Find out how adopting this filter can reduce your daily stresses...

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Football, seen through an untrained eye


I have never been interested in Football. In the first 50 years of my life I watched – maybe -three or four games with my Dad – one of them live at Villa Park. I don’t remember the score. 

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[Video] Reframing


Reframing is a word that gets used in lots of different circumstances. In the NLP sense, what reframing is all about is creating a different perception of a situation, or a thing, just by manipulating the words - the way you talk about it.

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Try to see it my way


“Try to see it my way”:  a line from an old Beatles song.  I’m not keen on the use of ‘try’ but I like the sentiment.  In a world where everyone is encouraged to develop their own point of view and to be confident in their opinions, seeing a situation someone else’s way is a valuable skill.

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Latest publication...


Maria Musgrove Wethey and Dianne Lowther wrote this one for Bridal Buyer magazine:

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What has NLP ever done for me?


Since I’ve been promoting the NLP Practitioner training I’m running later this year and also the two ‘Taster Days’ in June, I’ve been talking about NLP a lot more to clients and friends. One friend asked me, ‘So what has NLP done for you, personally?

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Why is okay to use the LAB Profile in recruitment when it’s definitely not okay to use MBTI?


Many years ago when I did the training to become a licensed user of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) it was impressed on me that the instrument is not to be used for recruitment purposes.  As there is only one licensed provider of MBTI training in the UK I’m fairly confident that everyone else who has been through the same training will have been given the same message.

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Men, women and leadership success


In the 1950’s in the UK when my parents married, for a while they both worked for the same company – ICI.  My Mum had left school with the equivalent of several GCSEs and she worked as a payroll clerk.

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Scarf Model

Why leaders need to work in teams


You may have read a previous article I wrote about the SCARF model. I wrote it very much as a leaders’ guide to the model and focused on what leaders can do to maintain the elements of the model for their teams.

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Stress and Sensory Preferences


Stress is a highly personal thing. The situation that has your heart racing and your mind in overwhelm doesn’t produce the same effect on everyone.

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Finding the Complex Equivalences


A few months ago I had lunch with a group of senior HR professionals and we discussed the idea of Talent Management.  One of the most striking insights to emerge from that conversation was the realisation that there is no unique, universal definition of Talent Management and that it means different things in different organisations and is conducted differently in different organisations.

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The SCARF model


Almost everything that is currently known about the way the human brain works was discovered in the past ten years. Recent advances in research have overturned old models of neurological operation and revolutionised the way we view our brains.

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