[Article] Am I bothered?

‘Am I bothered?’ asked another, much more famous, redhead.  The implication being that she’s not and it’s a good thing.  Being bothered is uncool.

In that context, being bothered means allowing other people to have an effect on your state of mind. It means caring that someone is annoyed with you. It means being upset because you’re going to miss out on something. In effect, it’s a show of weakness.

So why have I chosen ‘being bothered’ as my motto this month?

I’ve noticed that when I’m busy I let some things slide.

During December I allowed email to pile up in my inbox to an extent I’d be embarrassed to reveal. But I couldn’t be bothered to file it all. I felt that I deserved a break.

There were also piles of papers, magazines and mail building up in corners of my office. An eyesore and an irritation. But I couldn’t be bothered to organise it all and put it away. I thought I’d earned a rest.

During the Christmas break, food was abundant and lots of it unhealthy. I snacked too much because I couldn’t be bothered to cook healthy meals. I didn’t want to spend my holiday in the kitchen.

Perhaps I’m not the only one.

The other aspect of this I’m very aware of, is that I became annoyed with myself for letting things slide. I was irritated by my disorganised office. I was bored with eating junk. So not being bothered to do certain things ended up being the cause of me being very bothered by the consequences!

It’s all a matter of values…

A Value is something that’s important to you like Family, Friendship,  Achievement, Challenge or Fairness. If you like, they’re the things you ARE bothered about. When your values are fulfilled, you feel good. When your values are violated in some way, you feel less good – annoyed, irritated, sad or stressed.

For example, one of my values is Order. I like my home and my office to be orderly and neat. I feel much more relaxed when everything is in its place and everywhere is clean and tidy. It ‘bothers’ me when it’s not.

That’s why I’ve decided to ‘be bothered’ this month. By being bothered to keep my office tidy and my email under control and I can save myself the stress that comes from disorder. In situations where previously I’d been telling myself ‘I can’t be bothered’ I’m now enjoying the feeling of ‘being bothered’ and getting things done that matter to me.

So, I’m bothered. Are you bothered?

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